No one walks in LA, but anyone can shoot a handgun

I leave Los Angeles tonight. I had an absolutely amazing time. The service here is phenomenal! People consistently went way out of their way to assist me. I had two of the best dates I've had in six months. Reconnected with an old friend whose love of LA & Santa Monica was infectious. Perhaps I didn't promote my visit heavily enough, but I barely saw any clients; so fear not NYC, I'm not leaving yet. I caught the new Neil Gaiman & Dave McKean flick, Mirrormask. As to be expected, it was beautiful and enjoyable. But the absolute highlight of my trip was shooting pistols last night at the LA Gun Club! Though I've shot rifles in NYC, the laws are much stricter and you can not just stroll into a shooting range and say, "hey pass me that beretta." Out here, you can!!! Just not alone. Some kind of suicide prevention thing. So I hit LA's craigslist with the following ad:

Want to go shoot guns and/or see the Weegee exhibit at the Getty?

And you thought that was just a catchy title. Nope, I'm serious. I live in NY and am just here on vacation for one more day. NYC gun laws seem to be MUCH stricter. I've never shot a handgun and have always wanted to. I called a gun club here in LA, but people aren't allowed to go alone. Wanna go shoot guns?

I also am interested in checking out the Weegee exhibit at the Getty.

I don't think there is much opportunity for conversation at shooting ranges, but the following outlines a bit about me and whom I typically seek.

I would like to meet someone interesting, intelligent and articulate. I am, of course, all of the above. I like violent asian films (think Takashi Miike), am relatively apolitical, have a twisted sense of humor, am an unrepentant smoker, believe deeply in the merits of caffeine, am dangerously impulsive, find spelling/grammatical errors on shop signs both irksome and occasionally amusing. Oh yeah, the shallow stuff. I'm pretty, sexy, tall with dark red hair, hazel eyes, long muscular legs and a voluptuous figure.

I like smart men without pretension. Please have a solid grasp of the English language, lived adventurously enough to have a few tales to tell and know how to laugh. Tall wiry guys typically turn my head but a fully functioning brain and a twisted sense of humor are required to hold my interest. Kindly reply with your photo and something about you that might pique my interest.

So...are you ready? I'm headed out to see a flick now, will check my email around 6:30/7, the range is open until 11!

I received about twenty-five responses by the time I returned from the movie. Some were downright scary. The guy built like a linebacker in a black suit, black shades and "enforcer" written all over him, sent a one line reply, "I love guns." The teenaged gangbanger complete with bandana tied around his head, said, "Yo! bitches wit guns are hot!!!!"

The guy I actually went out with really fit no stereotype. Intensely intelligent, hardcore geek cred, MacGyver claimed skills that I didn't have the opportunity to test, an absolutely sincere smile and enough in common with me to talk until six am.

We shot off about a hundred rounds each, using a Beretta 92FS and a Kimber Eclipse Custom II. I was so excited when we arrived that I actually jumped up and down like a little girl. However, as the guy behind the counter talked to us about which guns to choose, I was suddenly sobered by how absolutely dangerous guns are. So it was with a healthy respect for the weapons we were about to use that I put on the eye and ear protection they provided. But by the time we were actually in the lane, I was totally psyched and excited again. It was SOOOOO much fun.

So...I'm off for my last LA shopping trip (the amount of money I've spent this week is obscene).