Wednesday

My week in review: Sunday night--deep stress and fear regarding pending visit with Dr. Zaroff for neuro-psych evaluation as recommended by one of our couples therapists due to excessive memory issues. I'd never experienced this fear of going to the doctor's office. I haven't had a root canal and my childhood dentist was a family friend. My first gyn exam was with a friendly middle-aged woman who was upset with her assistant for having had me disrobe before meeting her; after inserting the speculum, she had me sit up and handed me a mirror so I could "see what's going on down there." No doc related stress ever. But this time I was really scared that I was going to find out that I have a tumor, or brain eating bacteria or even that my brain had irrepairably atrophied from lack of use and that within months or years I'd be a drooling idiot. In short, scared. So Monday afternoon, C and I go in for the hour long preliminary interview, he leaves and I spend the next five hours arranging colored blocks, trying to recall grocery lists, filling in circles with #2 pencils and naming animals and colors. The results? I'm "of superior intelligence" with lower than average short memory/thought organization processes and once I start taking my effexor regularly and deal with the depression/mood swings/ADHD that have been present since I was 16, I'll be fine. Tell me something I didn't know when I walked in the door!"

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